The title above may lead you to think along different lines than those I will be highlighting. I aim not to deceive you, but will discuss those that do have such intent.
I must first be honest; I have always been one of those girls that loves a good chick flick. I appreciate other films as well, but sometimes it's nice to have that "feel-good" romantic movie. It is something that I'm sure many women would also say is a statement of fact for them as well.
I recently engaged in a discussion about this very topic... and it (without my knowing) changed my perspective. I just watched the new release "Letters to Juliet." It is a very typical chick flick. (**SPOILER ALERT**) I put that alert just to be kind; however, it's kind of difficult to ruin a chick flick these days. When anyone sits down to watch one, the outcome is generally understood... which, 9 times out of 10 is why they are watched in the first place. This movie was about a girl who is engaged, goes on a "pre-honeymoon" (something of which I had never been aware of its existence...) to Barcelona wither her fiancé. The two of them end up spending barely any time together, realizing they are not meant to be together and the girl ends up finding the "love of her life" while helping another to do the same.
Now, to the deception... The conversation I referenced above was one, with a certain perspective, of high controversy. In the conversation, an analogy was made between romance novels/chick flicks and pornography. This was not a perfect analogy by any means, but certainly one worth taking the time to consider. Pornography is an attack on the dignity of the human person. One of my favorite quotes (which I, of course, fail to remember at the moment...) discusses how pornography doesn't show too much, but shows too little. The "too little" is obviously not referencing the physical. The beauty of the human person can be shown in a non-sexual way. Pornography emphasizes the sexual and takes away the humanity of the individual. The analogy took (just for this purpose) pornography as being a temptation for men... and compared it to romance novels/chick flicks to be a similar temptation for women. This analogy breaks down when you remember that pornography is evil at its root... whereas romance novels/chick flicks are not. However, both distort and misguide the beauty of the human person. Pornography does it in the way I have just described; romance novels/chick flicks do it in a different and, dare I say, an even more deceptive manner. These stories latch on to the female emotions and place desires and things to be desired in her mind. Women are always longing for that “prince charming” who is perfect in every way. These stories give women the criterion with which they can “measure up” their significant other. Sorry guys, but, the man is bound to fail.
What the women (and those who produce the films/stories) may or may not realize is that these desires for the perfect “one” is completely normal and legitimate. Don’t worry, I didn’t just contradict myself. This “One” is Jesus Christ Himself. While men and women both desire to be with Christ at their core… women do it in a very unique way. Because, as it says in the Ephesians 5, men are called to love their wives as Christ loved the Church… and women are called to be subordinate to their husbands – as the Church is to Christ. This is a hefty task for both parties. At the same time, the woman must realize that her husband is not perfect. He can strive to be Christ-like, but cannot attain perfection. These films may not portray men as perfect, but they teach women to desire perfection and accept nothing less. This is dangerous. This causes women to create a “laundry list” of sorts for that perfect one. This list takes away the humanity of the individual just as pornography does. Once again, this is on a different level, but has some comparable factors.
Now, any time I watch romantic films/chick flicks, I really try to keep this in mind. This is not to deter women from ever watching these again. However, it is critical that you keep yourself at a safe emotional distance. Remember, you can always find happiness… but, happiness is not for “ever after”… it is something that you must work for and realize that only true happiness comes with God’s grace. I’ve heard many times from happily married couples that they must *choose* to love each other every day. The desire may not always be present, especially at the most difficult times! I hope this has given you something to seriously consider.
